It’s been awhile since I’ve serenaded you with veggie verses, so it’s my pleasure to present to you my take on Kanye West’s “Golddigger,” with a gardening spin.
“Weed Digger”
She gives me veggies, when I’m in need
Yeah she’s a gardening friend indeed
Oh she’s a weed digger, way over town
That digs on me.
Chorus:
(She gives me veggies.)
Now I ain’t sayin’ she a weed digger (when I’m in need)
But all these plants are getting bigger, bigger.
(She gives me veggies)
Now I ain’t sayin’ she a weed digger (when I’m in need)
But all these plants are getting bigger, bigger.
Get down girl go head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl go head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl go head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl gone head
18 plants, 18 plants
She got one of every kind, about 18 plants
I know somebody putting stakes up for all of those beans,
Her green thumb mamma helps secure it so that it never leans.
You will see her there outside on any given day
Digging up the dandelions out from the clay.
She was supposed to buy some new clothes with some of her money
But went down to the greenhouse and got seeds with that money
Now she keeping her plants safe from that meddling bunny,
So that it doesn’t eat the greens she bought with all of her money.
If you ain’t no punk, holla “We want turnips!
WE WANT TURNIPS!” Yeah.
It’s something that you need to know
‘Cause what you’ll see when you go to her home.
18 plants, 18 plants
And in her flowers you can find a happy little gnome.
Chorus:
Now I ain’t saying she’s a weed digger (she got needs)
She don’t want her yard to suck, so she pulls those weeds
Her OCD compels her every day to rake up the leaves,
There’s green beans in the back, so she rolls up her sleeves
She got that ambition, baby, look in her eyes
This week she’s picking peppers you would normally buy.
So, stick by her side
I know this girl is crazy, but the garden is nice
And she gonna keep weeding and trying
But you stay right there
‘Cause when you need some good tomatoes she is willing to share.
Get down girl go head get down
Get down girl go head get down
Get down girl go head get down
Get down girl go head
(lemme hear that back)
Like the blog? Buy the books!
P.S. A reminder that Facebook is limiting what you see, so if you don’t want to miss anything, be sure to subscribe here on the blog and/or follow me on Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest.
Abby Has Issues 
That is fantastic! I totally sung along in my head. Well done.
I did too!! (sing it in my head). Awesome. I like that song, and will not hear it the same again. 🙂
I bow before you.. She gardens, she writes, she raps. Weirdly I wrote about growing tomatos today.. must be in the air. Holla!
Brilliant! I sang along in my head and you nailed it. My favorite parts? “Somebody putting stakes up for all of those beans” and
“She went down to the greenhouse and got seeds for your money.”
The only thing that could make this better is if you did a video of you rapping it. Hi-larious and so clever.
“WE WANT TURNIPS!” Funny as hell.
Meddling bunnies….SNORT! Girl, you so funny!
Love this!!
You have a gift! This was so funny and creative! 😉👍
“Her OCD compels her every day to rake up the leaves” and “This week she’s picking peppers you would normally buy” are my favorite lines. Song parodies not easy to do well, but you pulled it off!
Brilliant!
Awesome! We want turnips and that meddling bunny killed me.