Ask Abby Anything

I have a “real” to put up soon, but today I present a completely self-indulgent “Ask Abby Anything” segment. The “TODAY” Show hasn’t called to interview me yet and considering I’m nosy about other people, I thought you might be nosy about me.

Then I realized how vain that sounded and regretted the idea, but it was too late to take it back so I just moped about it for a few days and then decided to shut up and answer your questions instead.

I couldn’t cover them all in this post, so I’ll do the second part shortly—if you don’t find this horribly boring.

Let’s move on.

Surprisingly, the first question wasn’t, “Why do you ramble so much before actually getting to the point?” but rather, “When you write, do you ever feel like any topic is ‘off limits?’ Are there things you want to write about, but shy away from because the blow-back might be too severe?”

Yes and no. I don’t shy away from anything, but at the same time I try to make sure that I’m writing about me more than anyone else. I don’t mean that in a self-centered way, but rather that there are a lot of stories out there that aren’t mine to tell. I have issues—sometimes with other people—but I don’t need to vent that all here. Given the fact that anyone can find anything on the Internet, I also make sure I wouldn’t regret my boss or a relative reading it.

I’ve also changed the direction of my blog a bit in the past year and kind of avoid more serious topics now. For every post that is questionably funny, there are probably 10 “serious” ones that get trashed. I figure everyone has their own crap and gets bored reading about mine all the time. I kind of just want to have fun.

“Have you ever had any funny/awkward interactions from co-workers or other people in your day-to-day life reacting from something they read on your blog?”

Blogging is weird because you never know who has read something. After I published this post, a coworker (with a great sense of humor) made a point to tell me he replaced the paper towel all by himself. There have also been times people have asked me about things I’ve mentioned and I get freaked out until I remember that I blogged about it. It’s nice to know they read, but also weird because I don’t know as much about them.

“When it comes down to brass tacks, do you think beer in the glass or beer in the bottle is more classy?”

I don’t even like beer, which is not a trait I inherited from my mom. However, when I was a cocktail waitress in college I had a woman who insisted I serve her draft beer in a wine glass because she thought it looked classier. Questionable, at best. Final word? I say bottles save you from washing a glass. The end.

“Crunchy peanut butter or smooth? And, more seriously, when did you make the decision to be vegan and why”?

Smooth sunflower seed butter, as I can’t tolerate peanut butter. And while I like almonds, I’m not a huge fan of almond butter.

As for the vegan issue, I rarely ever talk about that here in any depth because I’m not preachy and figure to each their own. The short version is that I was a vegetarian for eight years before I went vegan. My decision was a combination of my own health (another topic in and of itself) and ethics. Once I learned that animal agriculture is responsible for the death of over 56 billion animals worldwide each year–not even counting fish—and that even animals raised under the most “humane” circumstances suffer tremendously, it wasn’t hard to transition.

Given my  history with OCD, exercise and food, veganism also gives me a sense that the food I’m eating has a nutritional and ethical purpose. This helps ease the guilt that has dominated my eating for years and I never feel deprived, only rewarded. A majority of the blogs that I read are vegan/veggie-centered, so if you want recommendations, let me know!

“Why is it you always get the chance to see squirrels dancing? What am I doing wrong?”

I get them drunk on fermented fruit. Also, they signed a contract that barters seeds for a minimum of two hours of entertainment a week.

Stay tuned for part two in which I address hummus, couches and love—and any other questions you want to leave in the comments below. Otherwise, my turn.

“Who is the one person you would like to interview and why?”

Like the blog? Buy the NEW book here. Why? It has stories about drunk nuns, Vanilla Ice and adventures at the ATM. It’s obviously destined to be an American classic.

20 responses to “Ask Abby Anything

  1. Fun questions and even better replies! I’d interview Dave Matthews. We could talk smack about guitars and music then party until someone leaves for the ER.

  2. Draft beer in a wine glass? Curiouser and curiouser… Going to try it though!

  3. Since no one has ever really understood me, I’d like to interview myself. Some of the answers would probably be lies, though!!

  4. The Judgmental Cook

    Who would I interview? No one. I am not nearly as interested in other people as I am in myself and I already know me. But I do read your hilarious blog and if you want to be nosy about me, then you can read my blog. Which is here on Word Press.

  5. What a great idea! I’m so glad you addressed the “dancing squirrels” question. That one kept me up at night 🙂 I wish I could be vegan but I don’t like vegetables, and I suspect at some point I’d suffer the consequences of living off chocolate. Thanks for coming by my blog the other day. It was so so nice to see yours as the first comment.

  6. I would like to interview Bill Clinton, raw and unfilitered, and find our what 1992-2000 was really like and about, leading the free world. Funny thing is, I’m not a fan of his, personally, but I think he’s smart, funny, and would actually be a great interview.

    I would also like to interview Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic. I have Nirvana and Kurt questions.

  7. I don’t know anything about these squirrels dancing, Abby, but I love squirrels. I hope to see dancing squirrels soon.

    I would like to interview my father. There are so many things I want to know but respect his quiet nature.

  8. I’ll have to try me some sunflower seed butter.

  9. you know I can’t say that there is anyone I would be interested in interviewing. It’s not that i’m not interested in others and how they think because I actually find it fascinating but perhaps more that they should be able to decide what to put out there and what to not.

    I would love to get some good veggie-centered links if you are up for posting some of those at some point in time.

  10. I think we need to get our squirrels together for a theater performance. Mine dance (I.e. heckle my cats) all day long, although I know they have bigger dreams. You can see it in their beady little eyes and they way the swish their tail. Therefore, I’d have to interview Mac, who is the leader of the squirrel pack.

  11. A list of excellent questions. I know we differ in our approach to peanut butter, but as someone known to indulge on holidays and special events, the crunchier variety has a lot to recommend it

  12. I can’t tolerate peanut butter either AND I’m also vegan.

    We should be friends.

    Oh, wait, we already are. Loved this post, Abby!

  13. Beer in a wine glass…hmm. Not feeling it. Only magical wonderful wine belongs in wine glasses.

  14. First, I think this qualifies as a “real” post! I was looking forward to reading all of your answers and finding out the inside scoop. I’d been emailing Ann Curry to interview you at the Today Show, but we all know how that went…

    I really liked your answer to the vegan question, especially this part:

    “…veganism also gives me a sense that the food I’m eating has a nutritional and ethical purpose.”

    For me that’s what makes veganism easy. People often focus on how hard they think it would be or limiting. My experience was that I discovered a whole bunch of fruits, vegetables, beans, grains, etc. I wasn’t eating before or maybe didn’t even notice in the grocery store. The amount of foods I was eating became more varied and more interesting. Second, when it came to the foods I was no longer eating, it was easier to turn them down because it wasn’t over calorie-counting or watching fat grams or something like that. I was turning them down for ethical reasons, and that made it much closer to my heart and therefore much easier.

    Thanks for answering my question about awkward interactions with coworkers and friends reading your blog!

    If it could be any person who has ever lived, the person I’d most like to interview is Mr. Rogers. I’m bummed that I never got a chance to meet him before he passed away. He seemed like a really authentic and genuine human being.

    • Well, for what it’s worth, your blog is one of about five or six that I ALWAYS recommend to people who ask what I read. You get it. I dig it 😉

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